Season Record: 51-26
I’m back, bitches! Week 5 is a wrap, and man… What a week.
We have three undefeated teams remaining, the Jags who have yet to win a game and a lot of questions still arising from some of these lurking-around-the-threshold teams.
I have no idea if that last thing made sense.
To the recap!
Saints @ Bears
As always, I gotta start with My Chicago Bears. This is the second week in a row where we get blown out, come back with a TD and a two-point conversion and lose by 8. It’s a getting a little frustrating as my dude Brandon Marshall put it. I know it’s not as easy to just move the ball down the field in the first 55 minutes of the game as it is in the last 5 when you’re down 16, but I don’t know why the Bears don’t try to take some more shots down the field. Or at least to the middle of the field. Shit, do something other than check it down for 3-4 yards to Matt Forte and Martellus Bennett. Fuck!
The Saints, on the other hand, were really good. Drew Brees is a beast, and while I find the way he looks over his offensive line adorable, the pinpoint accuracy in his throws is insane. New Orleans challenged Chicago’s safeties and corners all game long and pretty much had its way with them. I still like the Saints to challenge the Seahawks in the NFC Championship.
Luck’s Got Everything to Do with It
Speaking of Seattle, they lost to Indy this week. Which says a lot about the Colts. For those who thought their win over San Fran was an outlier, a fluke, well, you were incredibly wrong. I am sort of including myself in this. I didn’t think it was as much a fluke as it was just a bad performance by the Niners, but this game showed me everything I need to know about Indy. They’re going to be a playoff team, possibly win the division since Matt Schaub seems intent on throwing TDs to opposing defenses, but most importantly, the Colts will be a scary team in the playoffs. Let me tell you why…
By no means do I think the Colts will make the Super Bowl; their defense isn’t good enough. But any team that plays them will have to play at their highest level to win. Andrew Luck is a monster, and when this offense is clicking on all cylinders, they can hang with the best of them. If they can establish any sort of running game as the season progresses, I’ll be willing to say they’ll play the Broncos in the AFC Championship game.
Broncos @ Cowboys
Man, am I glad I decided to keep watching football after the Bears game. This will definitely be a candidate for Game of the Year. Not that that’s an official award or anything. Anyway, Peyton Manning threw his first interception of the year, making his historic season anything but. Let’s move on, people. Nothing to see here.
How ’bout the bootleg that fooled the world? Would you believe me if I said I knew Peyton had the ball? When he moved his hand away from Moreno (or whoever was back there), you could kinda see that he still had it. The camera man obviously didn’t see it because he just shot Moreno doing a three-inch hop into his offensive line. All the while, Peyton’s taking about 43 seconds to get to the end zone. I still think he should’ve thrown the ball up and caught it himself in the end zone to give himself another TD, but hey, that’s just me. Denver’s the clear Super Bowl favorite, and next week, they host Jacksonville. R.I.P.
Quick Bits
- The Chiefs are the other undefeated team, but Alex Smith is such a boring player that I had to look up what team it was.
- The Lions’ offense without Calvin Johnson is a perfect symbol for the city of Detroit.
- The Giants are fucking garbage.
- New England really needs Gronk back.
- Fuck the Dolphins. Never picking them again.
No primetime game coverage as I didn’t watch any of them. I’m totally lying. I’m watching the Falcons/Jets right now, but I’m not recapping this fucking game.
Oh, Tony…
The Broncos/Cowboys had such a sad ending. Even if you hate the Cowboys (as I do), you couldn’t help but just feel bad for Tony Romo. This man went toe-to-toe with the greatest quarterback of all time, led late in the game, and essentially ended the game in the worst way possible (since he’s Tony Romo): with an interception. Was it a bad throw? Ehh… It wasn’t the best throw. But it was a great play by Danny Trevathan.
Anybody who blames Romo for the loss needs to eat a thousand dicks. How can you blame the guy responsible for pretty much all 48 points. Romo played the best game of his career. He was extending plays with his legs and making ridiculously accurate throws. Fuck you if you talked shit about Romo after this game. Games like these are why I chose Dallas to win the NFC East. The Cowboys have played pretty well so far, it’s just their defense that has failed them. Dallas had absolutely no pass rush this game, and you just can’t do that against Peyton. Yes, he’s getting rid of the ball in like .08 seconds, but you gotta get back there.
At the end of the day, we got a great football game. This will go down as Romo’s best game ever, and it was a loss. For Peyton, it will be just another perfectly orchestrated game in which he came out victorious.
Actually, I’ll say this about the Monday Night game… FUCK FANTASY FOOTBALL.
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